The real title of this post is how to live with decor you don’t like and cannot change right now or maybe ever. I’ve wanted to chat with you about this for quite a while now because I think you are like me. And I have a confession. I don’t like everything about my home. So how can we live with decor when we don’t like things about it?
First, let’s just state the obvious… no home is perfect! No home ticks off all our decor boxes. And all homes are or should be a work in progress!
Please remember these things. Sometimes we get so frustrated and think, “if only I could change such-and-such I would be happy with my home”. No matter who you are, we all live with things we would love to change in our homes.
I am certainly in that club, for sure!
My biggest UGH about our Tanglewood home is the flooring! I am so thankful we have hardwood floors and they are a beautiful blessing but they are an ugly color! We are living with them as is. Period!!!!!
Our ugly colored hardwoods are all over our home which means I see them every waking minute I am home. And I am home most days, all day!
I’m telling you this because I want you to know that I have made my peace with my floors.
Once in a while I look at them as the sunlight magnifies their orange tinge and cringe a bit but then I remind myself that I am blessed to have these floors. And I have decided to not spend one ounce of energy fussing over something I cannot change!
We moved into a home that was already built. But it was new. It was quite perfect for our needs and our season of life, but I definitely wanted to change some things. And I knew there were things I had to live with too.
So here’s the big question again, how do we live with things in our home that we cannot change right away or ever?
I think the Serenity Prayer really was on to something when it comes to our lives, but maybe decorating too! And I’m not kidding!
Dear God, Grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference.
We need to live by this little prayer!
THINK BETTER OF YOUR HOME
It’s important to not let our emotions run away when we think about our homes and what we are not happy with.
I live decor! I breathe decor! I love decor! And I am a home person. So I want to love my home. Does this sound familiar to you? Maybe just a little?
If left to my own bent I could get very emotional about my home and the things I don’t like! And maybe that is okay for just about three seconds! But if we focus on the bad or ugly we will miss the beauty and joy of our homes!
I always told my children when they were growing up to think better of people and not worse. So let’s do the same about our homes! We are so hard on them!
Wouldn’t it be nice to get up every day and just think lovely thoughts about our homes? Really this should be our default.
One thing I love about the Tanglewood House is the sunlight! It streams through our windows and our home is light and bright even on cloudy days. Oh, I love love love this!
When I think about the beautiful light in our home it makes me so happy!
Thinking loving and lovely thoughts about our homes may be a test of our wills but it is so worth the effort. LIVE out happy thoughts! Give your home some grace!
Just do it!
MAKE A PLAN
Let’s chat about the things in our home we possibly can change, but maybe not right now.
We may not be able to change things now but we can think about changing them now. Dream a little and plan!
It’s so important to have a plan. If you read StoneGable then you have heard me say this many times…
IF YOU FAIL TO PLAN YOU PLAN TO FAIL
How true, friend!
Here the next thing we are changing in our home..
Tanglewood has a double set of stairs to a loft area. The stairs and loft area can be seen from the hall, the living room, the dining room, and the sunroom. The loft runs the length of our living room and entryway.
There are a whole lot of white spindles on those stairs. And a lot of golden oak flooring and banisters. A lot! Way too much!
The stair could be a beautiful centerpiece of our home but right now they scream for attention when they should be a bit more quiet! Making them fit more comfortably in our home is my goal.
So I’ve been planning and planning for about a year to make the stairs over.
I made a plan! And a list of what I could change and could not. The floors are on the could-not-change list. And so is the number of spindles!
Our goal is to change the spindles to soft graphite color wrought iron spindle and paint a little bit of the bullnose of our stairs white to blend in with the rest of the trim and stair risers.
We are also adding a wide carpet runner to the stairs and landing.
And we will make the loft into a pretty small living area for our overnight family and guests to enjoy.
We are in the process of getting estimates and samples and soon we will make a decision to begin! This will be a big job for sure!
If there is something you are thinking about changing someday it’s really not too early to make a plan.
I love to peruse Pinterest, blogs, and decorating magazines for ideas. These ideas can start our creative minds working and collecting doable ideas will help us not feel overwhelmed.
Make calls and get estimates. Yes, now! Collect samples and more samples.
BUDGET TO CHANGE THINGS YOU DON’T LIKE
Without a realistic budget our dreams to change things in our homes will not become a reality!
One of the smartest things we can do is have a budget for decorating changes.
We budget for everything else but for some reason, many of us don’t have a decorating budget. It’s okay to acknowledge the importance of living with beautiful things and plan for things in our homes to wear out or go out of style.
A budget is an important part of moving towards changing the things we don’t like in our homes.
EMBRACING THE THINGS YOU DON’T LIKE INTO YOUR DECORATING PLAN
Remembering that all homes have their flaws and everyone lives with something they are not in love with in their home, we should embrace those things and invite them to be part of our plan!
To do this we must remember to think better of our home and focus on the great things about the spaces we live in.
Here are three great ways to embrace those not so perfect things in our homes…
HIDE AND CAMOUFLAGE
Some things in your home can be hidden easier than others!
Just think of my floors! Not so easy to hide. But my rugs do a great job at calling attention to themselves and not the floor that supports them!
Hide an unfortunately placed door by painting it and the trim the same color as the wall.
Paint a bed you do not like. Actually, paint almost everything you do not like! Paint is your best decorating friend!
Add a pretty throw and pillows to a sofa you just don’t want to look at.
Get creative and fool your eye by calling attention away from what you don’t like in your home.
IGNORE IT
This is so much easier than you think! I think most of us are decor blind when we live with something we do not like for a while.
Do the best you can to incorporate the offender into your decor and then be okay with it! And please, please, please do not let it steal your joy or prevent you from sharing the hospitality of your home with others!
And never, ever apologize for having something in your home! Love the good and ignore what you can’t change. There are many more important things in life to stress over!
THE TIDIER YOU ARE THE PRETTIER EVERYTHING WILL LOOK
When our homes are neat and organized our homes look better! Actually they look amazing! Even if there is something in your home you do not like.
Clutter does not hide the offender, it makes it look worse! When homes are pretty and clean and organized they look lovely!
I came from a humble home. It was not opulent or posh. But it was sparkling clean and we respected what we had. And it looked so pretty!
When my home is clean and no clutter is lying around and I have a vase full of just picked flowers from my yard on a table I don’t even notice the floors! Actually, most of the time I do not notice the floors!
Dirt and clutter enhance a home’s flaws. So let’s put our energy into things that work to make our homes lovely!
There is no magic to get rid of what we do not like about our homes. We can do our best to plan, budget, enjoy, hide, camouflage, ignore and, tidy up! And that is something! Something good!
Love your home with all it’s imperfections!
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE THESE OTHER DECORATING POSTS…
5 BIGGEST DECORATING MISTAKES AND HOW TO FIX THEM
Definitely highlight the things you do love about your home. One of the best things we did in our change from a traditional decor to a more transitional style was simply refresh the rooms by painting and changing out all of of our lampshades to a simple white drum style. Immediate gratification and it didn’t cost a small fortune. Several years later they still look fresh and more modern.
Yay! Lyn you have the right attitude!
So helpful. I too love all the sunlight pouring in our windows! It makes me happy and energetic. Love all your posts. Uplifting and informative!
Could you tell me the brand or where I could locate your lovely diamond patterned rug? THANK YOU!
Here you go:https://rstyle.me/+DF9OcYN_rlfzShtOr5HJgw
Great post!
Thank you Linda!
Hi Yvonne,
Here’s a thought……would you dislike your floors as much if you did not have floors to compare them to on Pinterest, blogs, magazines, etc.? I often love things until someone “plants the seed” that it is outdated or not on point. That’s how companies make their money, advertisers stay in business, how magazines sell their issues, and how decorators stay in business
I hear you, Janette, As a child of the ’80s (stretching that a bit) I am so tired of orange wood. Orange wood does not work with my home and my color palette as I said in this post. And as I also said I have made my peace with my floors! And am grateful! This post is not a commentary on how bad companies try to make us unhappy to spend money. But as decorators, we love to change things up. As you know, because you are a lifestyle blogger, we like to show people who love to decorate different options for their homes. I get inspiration from other bloggers like you and find lots of things I never thought of on Pinterest. If these sources make us feel bad or unhappy then it’s time for a break. Mostly, Janette, this post is about learning savvy ways to change what we don’t like in our home and learning to live with and love the rest.
A beautiful reminder that it’s ALL about being grateful for what we do have. The timing of your post is perfect. Thank you!
I hope this post was helpful!
Yes, somehow, this post was perfectly timed for me today, too! My 1880 small old house in upstate central NY has lots of things to be unhappy with- but I am retired ,single, and paid the mortgage off on my own in 9 years! So happy about that lol. As a thrift store shopper, I have been so blessed to find gorgeous items of all kinds at incredibly low prices- so many times new things still in the package. And furniture just needs a clean up and fresh paint to bring it all together. I really love Yvonne’s positive point of view. It isn’t about being controlled about major corporations, although I know that to be true in some aspects- this is about using your creativity, a little money, a lot of joy in making any space your best home.
Sue, you are fabulous! Congratulation on paying off that mortgage. YOU GO GIRL!
My problem is my kitchen cabinets their oak and have the orange look which I don’t like, their pretty style but I have to live with them because my hubby thinks their beautiful and you don’t mention changing the color!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sorry no advice for that! LOL!
Ironically, I recently replaced my dining room and hallway flooring with a warm golden color! With my color palette of a warm gray and white I like the balance of the warm color on the floors. Everyone has their vision of what their home should look like. I love my home and every morning when I wake up, it makes me happy. I walked through my house one day and made a list of all the things that I wanted to change. I then prioritized them in terms of cost and then I picked the ones that I could afford right now to change that would make the biggest difference. It has helped me focus. I think another tip is to focus on one room instead of trying to fix little things all around the house because you never get satisfaction. Thanks for the great post!
Great tips, Lynette!
Since moving to our current home, we have changed several things including new hardwood floors and a new kitchen.Our master bathroom needs to be redone but that isn’t going to happen anytime soon so I have changed accessories, towels etc to freshen up the space.I am very grateful to have a nice home but always looking to improve its function.I enjoy reading your blog and all the tips.
You are so sweet, Doreen!
You are so right! I have floors similar to yours and I love them. Initially I thought “I have to change these floors” Then I brought myself in check by acknowledging how beautiful wood floors are and how many people would love to have them- and now I am proud of them. They are authentic And not vinyl or other substitute.
I read your blog and recommend it often. Thank you.
Thanks Connnnie!
Hi Yvonne, I have the same hardwood floors and feel the same way. What color would you change them too if you were going to? Thank you for your wonderful blog!
Hi Jane, I’m very classic and want my floors to last a long long time so I would go lighter to a soft brown. No streaks or distress. Just classic. Or a gorgeous white pine but white pine is a softwood and dents and dings easily.
I love your floors. We have a house of antique pine we collected while living in England. I never tire of it and we have terracotta stained concrete floors. But this is coming from someone who has terracotta sofa. I am adding lots of white these days with paint, upholstery, and window coverings, and decor. I do love color but I am moving to a more neutral theme. I could never part with my farmhouse tables and accents pieces. Love all you offer to us would be decorators.
Oh, all sounds just beautiful! I love a home that is collected and curated!
Funny how differnet things in our home can drive us nuts until we learn to ignore it. I like your floors. They remind me of the ones in the house I grew up in and I loved them. Right now Meg is trying to decide on floor color and I have advised her to not be trendy because it will be forever before she coud afford to change them. Classic usually holds true!
Great advice for Meg! This is great advice for everyone!
Hi Yvonne,
I understand what you mean about your floors, we all have some things we dislike in our homes. However, have you read the blog, “In my own style” with Diane Henkler? She had similar coloured floors, and could not justify changing them all. She had them refinished by a company called Bona, and they look incredible! You might like to check her results out, just use the search bar for refinished floors.
I have original Parquet flooring in my 60’s bungalow but, found they show so much dust, and always need so much cleaning every day, we covered them with carpet. A sin is some people’s opinion but, I don’t want to spend my life cleaning floors all the time. ?
Diane is one of my favorite blogging friends! Thanks for the tip!
I think it’s funny that we both use rugs to cover up our orange floors! But trust me, your floors still look lots better than mine! Camouflage, paint. I agree. Great post!
Hi Liberty! So good to hear from you! We love hardwood floors and they certainly are a blessing. We are just not crazy about the color. Love from StoneGable to you!
What a wonderful message this is, Yvonne, and no one notices the things we don’t like. I always remind myself how lucky I am to have my beautiful home. Focusing on the positive is a key to happiness!
It was about time to address this topic. I think so many home decorators do focus on the things they don’t like in their homes. And I agree about thinking about all the blessings and being positive instead. Thanks for you insightful comment, Connie
Oh my. I guess it is all in how we see it. Like some of the other posters, I love love love your floors! They add a warmth to all the white/light neutrals which I also love. Please don’t change them. I understand. I went through that when we were seeing new builds in what I call a trend in flooring away from what we have. NOW I have friends who wish they had not jumped on that trend because they are wanting to mix an antique piece or one piece of darker furniture which does not show as well as it does on lighter “amber” authentic wood. I am soooo glad I did not refinish mine and change colors. They are authentic hardwood and I know I’m fortunate to have that. I think what you have planned for your stairs sounds wonderful. It will add warmth, too. I have wanted to add a runner to my stairs simply because I would like a pattern there.
Yvonne
I love your home, your positive energy, and your willingness to share your design talent. And I have to say that I think
Your floors are gorgeous. They look very high end, and the warmth of the amber tones provides a beautiful contrast to your light and bright decor. The rugs temper it just enough.
If your floor was more neutral – blonde or medium brown – the lack of contrast and color would appear flat. And I say this as a person who gravitated toward neutral and timeless ( I follow Maria Killam). I just love how your floors inject life into your home and showcase your beautiful decor.
Thanks, Katherine.
I love this post! It is so true. Perspective is very important. I LOVE the fact that you are teaching us to Love our homes. We are so very blessed! Thank you Yvonne. Job well done! Your home is very lovely and inviting. I enjoy your posts and your decorating style. I am learning so much. Thank you!
You are so sweet, Crystal!
You are amazing. I agree with everything you said in this post. I think your wooden floors are fabulous. But I know how it is when you are not loving something in your home. No matter what anyone says. I am not loving much about our home at this time, because my husband and I are renovating all over the place. Hopefully, once we are done, we can relax, exhale, and put a big smile on our face of gratitude and peacefulness. Thanks again, especially for this post.
I love this post! I always thought your home looked picture perfect but noticed the floors. It seemed that they wouldn’t be what you would have chosen if given the choice and how the rest of your home looks! I agree that it is possible to love your home despite some things that you don’t love. I am in that boat too! Also, your home is lovely and inviting.
You are so sweet Christine!
I tend to change the LITTLE decor items in my home quite frequently. These are the purchases I control. Of course, any larger purchases, my husband needs to have a say and that slows down the entire process (he’d rather I not spend so much on the smaller items, but he knows this gives me pleasure). By changing out things frequently and keeping a tidy and clean home, I feel a sense of pride and always want people to feel welcomed and cozy in my home. I’d love to change out my flooring, but when we bought it 15 years ago, we made a conscientious decision to purchase something we thought was classic (light cherry)…at the time…it appears somewhat dated now but it does look good with our dark cherry furniture. As long as it’s clean, it’s ok by me!