Hi, Friends! Today is Practically Speaking. And I have a topic near and dear to me and my home. Did you know there is no such thing as a perfect home? However, so many home decorators strive for just that. No wonder we get frustrated and even embarrassed about how our home looks sometimes. Many of us are under a false illusion of what we expect our homes to be. Today let’s talk about the real and authentic ways we should measure the worth of our homes!
First, we need to face the fact that our homes are not p-e-r-f-e-c-t! No one’s home is! Especially if the measurement of home perfection is perfectly decorated, perfectly organized, perfectly pristine, perfectly decluttered, perfectly perfect all the time. And for many of us, if we are truly honest, strive for this type of home perfection.
Let’s admit right off that there is NO SUCH THING AS A PERFECT HOME. Because by the very nature of living in a home. it will be imperfect!
Then, how should we be looking at our homes? What is the standard? If a home is not every really perfect what should we be striving for in a home?
I think a home should be perfectly imperfect! How about creating a home that is WELCOMING or TIDY or COMFORTABLE or WELL-LOVED or CHARMING? Those are much better standards for measuring a home!
We create homes to be a sanctuary for all who live in them. To find solace from the outside world. We entertain in them, love in them, eat in them, sleep, create, relax, talk, grow, laugh, cook, cry, work, play, lounge and everything in between. How could we ever have a perfect home?
Let’s free ourselves from that fairy tale of perfection.
Yes, we want neat, clean, organized, comfortable, lovely homes. Yes, we want to appoint and decorate them the best we can. But we should stop our striving there. Our need to impress others and our need of control should have no voice in creating a home to be proud of.
Goodness, this is so hard for us. Our homes are deeply attached and rooted in our self-esteem and the fiber of who we are! I honestly don’t know if I can totally shake that perception.
Decades ago, when we lived in our first house, when we would have company for dinner I would clean the entire house, do all the laundry and wax and buff all the floors before I cooked one mouthful of food. This routine got immensely tiresome, as you can imagine, and I started wanting company less and less often. No wonder! It was too wrapped up in myself and how others perceived me through my home to care more for my guest than myself. What a selfish and self-centered way to live!
I have a friend who I have known for over four decades, who will remain unnamed, who’s home is… well, a little disheveled. But her home is one of my favorites to visit. It has this magical power over me. I can’t wait to visit and when I do I feel so welcomed and safe and loved and I certainly overstay my visit. It’s a hard home to leave! This is a perfect home to me! My friend is calm and attentive and authentic and gracious. We talk and “go deep” and laugh and I love her and her home more and more every time I am in her home! Who wouldn’t want to be in her home?
I could care less that her home, although clean, is never quite straightened up and put together.
It was then I decided that my standard of a perfect home were going to be things like comfort, beauty, hospitality, joy and love! Because they are the best and most tangible way to create a home that is a sanctuary for all! My home could look imperfect and still be perfect to me.
What you see on my blog IS my real life, but it’s only a slice of my real life. Blogging is a very messy business. But if I can invite you in, in front of the cameras, and make you feel welcomed and comfortable and loved then I feel my home is perfect. If I can give you ideas and tips and make your life more creative and filled with joy and a “can do” attitude then I feel I’m reaching my goals.
But remember, StoneGable… and any other home you see on a blog or in a magazine or book, are real homes. You might see our homes in perfect shape for that moment. And for that moment, they may be. But, at least here at StoneGable, we are perfectly imperfect! We are real and messy and unorganized at times. And that is perfectly okay!
I have given up home perfection because I could chase that illusion the rest of my life and never come close to achieving it. And it’s exhausting.
And you should too. Let’s relax and work to achieve a home that is comfortable and beautiful. Not perfect.
A big YOU GO GIRL to all of you who have perfectly imperfect homes!!!