I remember that day so well! We had just moved into StoneGable. Mover’s boxes were piled high in every room waiting to be opened. And I could still smell fresh paint. Everything was new and beautiful and clean! Then why did I feel like the bottom of my world has just dropped out?
My husband called StoneGable my dream home.
I had loved this home from the minute I saw it in a magazine years earlier.
Spacious, but not ostentatious. A modern farmhouse with upscale finishes. And it looked so pretty and comfortable and inviting!
The house plans had been tucked away for quite a while. But they were always fresh in my mind! I just knew someday I would live at StoneGable!
That day I sent the children off to their new school. I smiled and waved to them from the front porch as they boarded their school bus.
My job for that day was to make a dent in the pile of boxes and to bring our life and personality to StoneGable. Instead, I went back to bed.
Out of the blue, a deep darkness settled over me! Just in an instant!
I started to cry and a very guilty feeling crept out of my core and started to crawl over my whole body. It was crippling! The only thing I could do was go back to bed!
That is where I spent the morning. My makeup was smeared from crying, my mascara running big highways of black down my cheeks stopping at my chin.
My pillow was a mess! I was a mess! I just could not stop crying! Big ugly crying! What was wrong with me? I had never experienced the pit of depression and the guilt that hugged me so tight that it suffocated me!
No warning, no slow onset, it just hit me square in my soul.
The morning droned on! Weeping and sleeping and crying some more!
Just before noon, there was a knock at my door. I would have never answered it in my condition but it was persistent! Very very persistent! I said to myself GO AWAY and put the covers over my head! But the knocking never stopped! Tap, tap, tap! Tap, tap, tap! On and on!
The person on the other end of the door would not go away!
I didn’t even have the energy to tidy myself up. I dragged myself and my the big blackness, that clung to me like a thick cloud of smoke, out of bed and down the stairs to answer the door.
I opened the door just the slightest sliver, just enough to see who in the h – – – was at the other end of the door trying to literally knock it down!!!! When you are that depressed your language goes in the pit too!
There stood Mrs.” Godworthy” !
She was smiling and happy and with a light and lilting voice she chirped, “Yvonne, I’m sorry to bother you, I know you must be busy today”.
Now, Mrs. “Godworthy” came by her name honestly several years before. Her real name is Mrs. GODFREY, but my children thought her name was GODWORTHY because “she is the godliest woman at church”.
My children really thought her name was Mrs. GODWORTHY! And from that day on she became Mrs. GODWORTHY to us.
So there Mrs “Godworthy” stood on my beautiful new wrap around porch.
I opened the door a little more. By now she could see my unraveled appearance and surprisingly it did not make her flinch. I did not see a passing look of horror cross her face or a raised eyebrow of “what in the world!”.
I begrudgingly asked Mrs. Godworthy into my box filled foyer and like a ray of bright golden sunshine she came through my new front door! I did not, could not, ask her to come any further. I did not ask her to take a seat or to have a cup of coffee.
All things that would be automatic in my home! After all, I was raised to be polite and hospitable and I dearly loved Mrs. “Godworthy”!
My lack of manners didn’t seem to make any difference. She just stood there smiling her sunshine all over my foyer! It bounced off of every surface illuminating everything!
“Yvonne”, she began,” this may seem a little crazy”.
Nothing could be crazier than how I looked, I thought. She went on, “God, sent me to give you a hug today”!
Yes, this IS crazy! You win, I thought to myself.
“I was on my way to visit my daughter and passed by your home earlier this morning and got an overwhelming feeling that I was to deliver a hug to you today. Isn’t that crazy?”
“I felt a little embarrassed to just come up to your door and tell you I needed to give you a hug sooooo, she continued in her chirpy sing-songy voice, I told God that if HE really did want me to give you a hug that I would do it on my way home!”
“I forgot all about the hug at my daughter’s and as I was passing your house on my way home I felt God telling me to get out of the car and give you a hug!
“Remembering my promise I pulled into your driveway and knocked at your door.”
Mrs. Godworthy is a tiny woman and I am quite tall. But that morning, in my foyer, when she wrapped God’s love around me with her arms I felt so small!
As she whispered, “Yvonne, God sent me to tell you that He loves you”! Then all the sunshine in the foyer reflecting everywhere got sucked right into my soul and banished the ugly darkness!
Mrs. Godworthy left as quickly and as happily as she came but the SONshine did not go with her. It stayed inside me to warm me and comfort me and to banish the demon I had been fighting with earlier that morning!
When God whispers in our ear listen and obey. If it’s really God He will whisper according to His word. And when you know it is God just obey!
But we have this precious treasure [the good news about salvation] in [unworthy] earthen vessels [of human frailty], so that the grandeur and surpassing greatness of the power will be [shown to be] from God [His sufficiency] and not from ourselves. We are pressured in every way [hedged in], but not crushed; perplexed [unsure of finding a way out], but not driven to despair; hunted down and persecuted, but not deserted [to stand alone]; struck down, but never destroyed;
Mrs. Godworthy took the treasure within her by the power of the Holy Spirit and poured it into my life! It was refreshing and life-giving because it was from God Himself!
You were made to be an earthen vessel that holds the GLORY OF GOD!!!!! Glory that needs to be shared and given to the whole hurting world! What a privilege! What a blessing! Share the SON!