Hi, Friends! Today is Practically Speaking. And I have a topic near and dear to me and my home. Did you know there is no such thing as a perfect home? However, so many home decorators strive for just that. No wonder we get frustrated and even embarrassed about how our home looks sometimes. Many of us are under a false illusion of what we expect our homes to be. Let’s talk about other ways to think about our homes. Today let’s talk about the real and authentic ways we should measure the worth of our homes! Today it’s all about the happy perfectly imperfect home!
Today on Decorating Tips and Tricks we are sleuthing some popular but untrue decoration beliefs. It’s DECORATING MISCONCEPTIONS DEBUNKING day!Yes, there are many decorating “rules” and “schools of thoughts” that are just plain wrong! Listen in and maybe we will be debunking some of your decorating beliefs too!
Listen to episode #142 below…
And please take us with you no matter where you are by following us on the podcast app of your phone. You can find out more about listening to DTT on your phone by clicking on the word PODCAST in the StoneGable header above.
Today is Home Style Saturday. My blogging buddies and I are digging into the archives and finding our most popular post so you can have another look! Make sure you stop by the bottom of this post to see more!
First, we need to face the fact that our homes are not p-e-r-f-e-c-t! No one’s home is! Especially if the measurement of home perfection is perfectly decorated, perfectly organized, perfectly pristine, perfectly decluttered, perfectly perfect all the time. And for many of us, if we are truly honest, strive for this type of home perfection.
Let’s admit right off that there is NO SUCH THING AS A PERFECT HOME. Because by the very nature of living in a home. it will be imperfect!
Then, how should we be looking at our homes? What is the standard? If a home is not every really perfect what should we be striving for in a home?
I think a home should be perfectly imperfect! How about creating a home that is WELCOMING or COMFORTABLE or WELL-LOVED or CHARMING? Those are much better standards for measuring a home!
We create homes to be a sanctuary for all who live in them. To find solace from the outside world. We entertain in them, love in them, eat in them, sleep, create, relax, talk, grow, laugh, cook, cry, work, play, lounge and everything in between. How could we ever have a perfect home?
Let’s free ourselves from that fairy tale of perfection.
Yes, we want neat, clean, organized, comfortable, lovely homes. Yes, we want to appoint and decorate them the best we can. But we should stop our striving there. Our need to impress others and our need of control should have no voice in creating a home to be proud of.
Goodness, this is so hard for us. Our homes are deeply attached and rooted in our self-esteem and the fiber of who we are! I honestly don’t know if I can totally shake that preception.
Decades ago, when we lived in our first house, when we would have company for dinner I would clean the entire house, do all the laundry and wax and buff all the floors before I cooked one mouthful of food. This routine got immensely tiresome, as you can imagine, and I started wanting company less and less often. No wonder! It was too wrapped up in myself and how others perceived me through my home to care more for my guest than myself. What a selfish and self-centered way to live!
I have a friend who I have known for over four decades, who will remain unnamed, whose home is… well, a little disheveled. But her home is one of my favorites to visit. It has this magical power over me. I can’t wait to visit and when I do I feel so welcomed and safe and loved and I certainly overstay my visit. It’s a hard home to leave! This is a perfect home to me! My friend is calm and attentive and authentic and gracious. We talk and “go deep” and laugh and I love her and her home more and more every time I am there! Who wouldn’t want to be in her home?
I could care less that her home, although clean, is never quite straightened up and put together.
It was then I decided that my standard of a perfect home was going to be things like comfort, beauty, hospitality, joy and love! Because they are the best and most tangible way to create a home that is a sanctuary for all! My home could look imperfect and still be perfect to me.
What you see on my blog IS my real life, but it’s only a slice of my real life. Blogging is a very messy business. But if I can invite you in, in front of the cameras, and make you feel welcomed and comfortable and loved then I feel my home is perfect. If I can give you ideas and tips and make your life more creative and filled with joy and a “can do” attitude then I feel I’m reaching my goals.
But remember, StoneGable… and any other home you see on a blog or in a magazine or book, are real homes. You might see our homes in perfect shape for that moment. And for that moment, they may be. But, at least here at StoneGable, we are perfectly imperfect! We are real and messy and unorganized at times. And that is perfectly okay!
I have given up home perfection because I could chase that illusion the rest of my life and never come close to achieving it. And it’s exhausting.
And you should too. Let’s relax and work to achieve a home that is comfortable and beautiful. Not perfect.
A big YOU GO GIRL to all of you who have perfectly imperfect homes!!!
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StoneGable | The Perfectly Imperfect Home
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On Sutton Place | Cast Iron Skillet Cranberry Crumble
Maison de Pax | Lazy Girl’s Guide to Beautiful Gift Wrap Ideas
Would you share where you got the large wooden clock in your formal living room. Thanks, I need one that large.
This is really a beautiful clock. Here is the link: https://www.ballarddesigns.com/lanier-wall-clock/229326
Messy people are more interesting and its easy to be around them. I am a little to picky about my home and sometimes it takes the fun out of things, hard to let this go. have to keep trying. Thanks for putting it in perspective!
Denise
Here’s what I would love from a home blogger- I have no problem with getting my home guest ready! So here’s my challenge- I’d like pictures of what things look like after all the guests arrive! ( and a few days into entertaining out of town guest) Shoes – coats-pillows on the floor- dishes in the sink- glasses and bottles on the counter! Family and friends enjoying your home- laughing and connecting! I’m working hard at -letting it go- savoring every imperfect moment- nobody enjoys a control hostess! Learning the balance of enjoying and yet keeping some bit of order! 😉
GREAT post idea, Tammy! Look for an answer in a post in January. LOVE your idea. And yes, things can get out of hand very quickly!
Thanks or celebrating our imperfections! Happy New Year!
Good can be lost in the pursuit of perfection.
I used to dream a perfect home when I was young but I never thought it could be a reality for me. Then I realized that my perspective of perfection didn’t have to be a decorator’s perfection! Suddenly, my home became perfect! Perfect for me & my family. Yes, things are still undone, broken, out of style or don’t match but my home is the most wonderful place in the world to me….so it IS perfect for me.
My goal for quite a few years now has not been a perfect home. I want people to feel like they’ve gone to grandma’s house when they come to mine. Originally I started copying my grandmother’s home…the colors she used & her styles. Then I realized it wasn’t what her home looked like that it made it so wonderful. It was how she made me feel when I was there. No matter how chaotic, messy or unprepared for guests I always knew she wanted me there & loved me. That’s what I want my guests to feel when they walk through my door.
Great! This means we can be human! However, I want our home to be a safe, organized, inspirational haven!❤️
I love the decorating ideas I got from this article. Love all the whites and neutrals. Thanks for the inspiration.
I love this clock. You can find it HERE: http://fave.co/2AegMTJ
Yvonne, I agree with everything you mentioned in your post. However, your home always looks immaculate, maybe just for the photo shoots, my home is clean but I wouldn’t say it’s squeaky clean, my sister always tells me that it’s a show place. I’m like you in many ways, I love to decorate and just love our home, it’s warm and cozy and I wouldn’t change a thing, and that’s the way it should be.
You’ve written a lot of good posts. This is your best bc it reminds us of the reason we do what we do —-make our homes welcoming and comfortable
Your HOME looks so pretty….love your kitchen !
Lovely gift to give ourselves, not just at the Holidays but all through the year — the gift to be imperfect AND to be OK with that.
Love reading your posts and love your house. I would love to be able to have some white furniture put at my house that won’t work!! Wishing you a Very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
I love when you use the touches of Tartan in your Christmas décor.
Great advice in this post!! I want my home to feel like your home does – warm and inviting. Merry Christmas to you & your family!!!
Oh my goodness… I always feel “welcome & comfortable” when I come into your home via your posts. Your visuals and instructions are calming & inspiring, and I always look forward to what is next. Thanks for doing what you do. I love my cozy, perfect home too! Merry Christmas xo
truly great advice… I have always been “house proud” and always striving for cozy and comfy! love your blog…merry Christmas and a happy new year!!!
Designer and dog lover, Annie Selke, once said “living with dogs helps you accept imperfection”. To me the fun and love of my dogs…toys all over the floors..is perfection!
Great advise! Love your blog!
Your home is so beautiful and looks so comfortable and cozy. Thank you for this advice now when I need it most with the holidays here and people dropping by to say hello. I hope I can relax and enjoy their company and not worry about my house.
Linda Owens
This is a perfect post for today. When I got up this morning, and walked through my house to get my coffee, I couldn’t help but notice how Christmas cluttered every part of my house. It kind of crept up on me and I was a little surprised- ’cause I do appreciate a decluttered, well decorated space. But with gifts piled high in most corners, Christmas cookie tins filled and on stand-by to make cookie trays for friends and neighbors and gift wrap not quite put away, the house doesn’t have the perfection I imagine for Christmas welcoming. BUT now, coffee in hand, looking around, it all seems quite perfect- Christmas is almost here and we enjoy the holiday so much, it’s nice to be immersed in it! Thanks for the reminder that it’s okay to take a break from perfection and be thankful for what we can offer others and just enjoy the moments ahead. Merry Christmas!
My friends all have different houses….family styles and responsibilities….I can drop in on them at any time and feel welcome. Me? I need to know you are coming so can tidy up and at least have a chair that does not have something on it or a surface to put a cup of coffee on. Me? When I go to someone’s house I bring the “and” to the coffee. Coming to my house? Oh! no! I will bake you a crumb cake. So….I turn into one big stress ball….but they still love coming over and visiting….to them, my house is “creative”. Hmmm….all I can think of is the Swedish Chef. But it is not about the houses or the coffee cake….it is about your friends. Well….I will never have a perfect home….but then, they are only in magazines or perhaps people don’t really “live” there! Beautiful pictures as always. Happy New Year!
Thank you Yvonne! You have and continue to be a “real” person with a lovely home and fabulous ideas! I know I am farrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr from perfect and never met anyone who is…but this makes me feel better about my less than perfect home. So very glad I found your blog those years ago!
Awesome post Yvonne! Yes, I’m definitely working on my home this coming year because we are going to be moving! It is quite a mess in some rooms right now, but soon it will be better! Thanks for sharing!
I do pray for ways to demonstrate hospitality to others. Great encouragement to be less concerned re the appearance of our homes.
Perfectly imperfect is my home. I do a thorough clean before company comes, but we live in this space. I just need to tell myself to stop and smell the roses especially this time of year. This is a very good blog .
Your home is absolutely calming and comfortable. When I read your blog, I feel like I am there! We have a new build, which we have been settling for over a year now, and I have used many of your tips and ideas to decorate it. Needless to say, I get a lot of compliments on it, and the best compliments people can tell me is how comfortable they feel in it, and that they love to come visit me! I owe much of that to you!
Thank you Marilyn, but YOU are the one creating a home! Congratulations on your new home!
What a great post! I know my house isn’t perfect but it is me! Some days I feel like something needs to be changed but it is home & comfortable & cozy! Thank you for being so real and down to earth ! I really feel like you are a friend & neighbor & I feel so comfortable in your home every day!
Thank you for this post most needed!!! I am one if company is coming every inch of the house has to be cleaned!!!!! “! am set free”!!!! God bless and Merry Christmas to you and your family
I, like hundreds of others loved reading about having a perfectly imperfect home. I am guilty of feeling things need to be perfect for me to feel good about having friends over and I have been working on changing this for a long time. Thank you for showing your real side and giving all of us permission to have a charming or a welcoming or whatever makes us happy, home.